Body Images Issues in Utah: Let’s Chat About It

You wanna know a topic I like to get fired up about? The wildly inappropriate and shockingly unrealistic standards of beauty that women have to live up to. There I said it. I’m not an expert on any of the other 49 states in the Union, but I can tell you here in Utah that body image struggles are off the charts. You can drive along I-15, and bam! Plastic surgery sign. Hit up next by a botox sign and chased down with a fat sculpting sign. Big old billboards inviting women and girls to look at their bodies with a critical eye, and if you don’t like them? Good news, throw down some cash money, and you can change it! Utah has got plastic surgeons for days. It’s enticing to think that everything you hate about your body can just be sculpted, augmented, tucked, and injected away. Even when a woman doesn’t want to go to those lengths to alter her body, she can still get microbladed eyebrows, lash extensions, hair extensions and spray tan. There are so many options as a woman to manipulate your appearance to hopefully arrive upon a body that you love and respect. The harsh reality of all this is that it doesn’t work that way. Self-loathing doesn’t suddenly morph into self-love After I feel that fiery anger in my gut, it becomes washed away in sadness. 

Real talk: I’m a big fan of DIY at-home lash extensions (bless up Lashify!), I love a foamy self-tan in a bottle, and you’ll see me wearing makeup 5 out of 7 days. There is nothing inherently wrong with wanting and doing any of this. Nobody is better or less than anyone else if they skip out on breast augmentation and deny botox. Trust me, there’s no Nobel prize for never highlighting your hair or altering your body. The cold hard facts, though? These don’t actually lead to lasting happiness, self-love, or a permanent positive body image. Why? Because it’s not about your body as much as you think it is. 

What does it mean to have body image issues?

99 percent of women probably have struggled with negative body image at some point in their lifetime. Body image can be a pervasive and ongoing issue, yet it feels normal for women to experience it. When is it crossing the line from being the normal brand of body image issues to clinically significant body image issues? This is hard for me to answer because, to me, any body image issue is worth addressing. As with any disorder, it becomes more concerning when it impacts your daily functioning. Clinically significant body image is obsessive thoughts and behaviors around manipulating and changing your body. This leads to depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, disordered eating, and eating disorders. 

What are the signs of negative body image? 

• Dissatisfaction with the way your body looks

• Engaging in body checking behaviors

• Speaking negatively about your body and appearance

• Fear of gaining weight 

• Needing reassurance from others that appearance is acceptable 

• Feeling that if your body were different, you would feel happier

• Poor self-esteem related to body’s appearance 

• Comparing your body to others’ bodies

What’s the cause of body image issues?

The cause of body image issues are complex, and it’s hard to pin down one factor or instance that led to the birth of negative body image. Several factors can lead to the perfect storm of body image issues. Here are some options. 

Social media: 

Swiping through hundreds of filtered and photoshopped images of women weekly is not helpful for anyone’s body image. Research suggests that the longer you view these images, the more it leads to body dissatisfaction. Research has also shared that those that have stopped using social media see improvements in overall well-being, depression, and anxiety compared to those who continue to use social media. Isn’t that wild? You probably didn’t realize how much social media impacts your overall mood. I know I didn’t. 

Early Childhood experiences: 

As a young child, bullying from peers about body size and shape can impact your beliefs about your body and what it’s supposed to look like. As a child at tender developmental stages, these comments can greatly impact you. Those beliefs about your body when you are younger may contribute to insecurity about your appearance and can then become a theme throughout your life. 

 Trauma and Abuse

Women who have experienced trauma and abuse may believe that their body is to blame for what happened. In our society, women’s bodies are often sexualized and objectified, making it feel like they have to hide their bodies to be protected from further trauma and abuse. Further, people who have experienced trauma and abuse develop body shame and feel disgusted and hatred toward their bodies. 

 Comments made by other people

This one. If you are my client sitting across from me and we are processing your body image history, and you share the comments people have made about your body, my eyes are either going to water, or I’m going to be internally angry, or both. It is common for women with body image issues to have had a mother, grandmother, or some other authority figure make negative comments about their body. This one is a heartbreaker. Women learn something is wrong with their bodies, and they need to change it. Even if these women didn’t have someone making comments about their bodies, they have witnessed other people in their lives speaking painful words about their bodies. In turn, you learn to be critical of your own body or start thinking about your body more than you did before. 

 Eating disorders and body image issues can go together 

Eating disorders and body image issues are a match made in…hell? While you can have an eating disorder without body image issues, it’s not as common. When a woman comes to therapy and says they have body image issues but no disordered eating, I have to check twice. Not because it doesn’t happen, but because it’s so common and disordered eating is so prevalent in our society that it’s hidden in plain sight. Negative body image can progress into an eating disorder. The negative beliefs you hold about yourself and your body feels like could be solved by changing your body. Often the first attempt at changing your appearance is to focus on weight loss. One in four women that diet will progress to having an eating disorder. It’s a slippery slope and is dangerous. Body image issues being dangerous is probably not the first thing that comes to your mind, but it’s the scary reality. 

 Postpartum body image issues 

What the hell is with this weird bounce-back culture to postpartum women? Sorry for saying hell, but the expectations not so kindly bestowed upon postpartum women are suffocating and disturbing. The expectations for you to get back to your pre-baby weight and body ASAP make me wanna scream into a pillow. As if sharing your beautiful body to grow another human for 9 months wasn’t hard enough, you give birth-which seems like the most painful experience a human body can go through, and then you have postpartum. Breastfeeding, hormone shifts, caring for a newborn babe, and sleep deprivation, BUT somehow you’re supposed to get washboard abs in the midst of this. This is not realistic, and it’s not ok. In Utah, this issue is extremely prevalent. Perhaps part of it is from watching social media influencers push this agenda, but this is a two-thumbs-down approach for postpartum women. 

 Why doesn’t changing your body cure body image issues?

You wanna know one of my least favorite things to see on social media? Women who have raved about their tummy tuck and weight loss surgery boosting their self-confidence. I’m not doubting this isn’t true for them, but the message that’s being shared is “I couldn’t be confident about my body without these procedures” and “If you want to be confident, get these procedures, and you’ll be confident in yourself too.” Deep breathes. This is harmful rhetoric. Reminder, if you have had these procedures done or want to have these procedures done, there is no judgment at all. This isn’t a moral issue, and it’s not right or wrong. I am addressing that passing this type of message on is damaging. These procedures are treating symptoms and not the real problem. What’s underneath all of this? What beliefs are you holding onto about yourself and your body that is resulting in all this self-hatred that makes you feel like you have to change yourself and your wonderful body? Beneath every procedure is still that wounded part of you that thinks your appearance is the most important part of you. Those feelings don’t miraculously dissolve because you change your body. I’m not arguing that you won’t be more self-confident, but I am arguing it won’t make you happier. It will never be enough. There will always be another procedure to try, and you will always be focused on your body. This doesn’t have to be your life. You can make peace with your body without focusing on changing it. Your body will change throughout time, and it’s a good body no matter what. I just want you to believe that. 

 How do I support someone I love with body image issues?

Listening to someone you love to pick apart their bodies can be bruuuuutal. It can be frustrating when no amount of reassurance seems to make a difference. Reassurance that their body is attractive actually can feed into the cycle, and often feels like you are wasting your breath. Here are some options to consider: 

1. Share with them the qualities and attributes you love about them that have nothing to do with body and appearance. 

2. Listen without judgment. You don’t need to try and fix what they feel. Please also don’t suggest eating healthier or going to the gym. Never do that, please and thank you. 

3. Avoid making statements about your body and other people’s bodies' appearance. This reiterates the importance of what a body looks like. 

4. Redirect to talking about their feelings and what’s bothering them instead of making negative comments about their body. 

 Body image therapy can help 

If you have identified yourself somewhere in this post, first of all, welcome. You’re safe here, and you aren’t alone. Many women feel shame for how they feel about their bodies because they believe they should just be thankful and not feel like they do. If only that would resolve everything. Using logic to outsmart your body image issues will definitely not be sufficient to work through it. Body image therapy is an important step in stopping the war and fight you have with your body. Therapy for body image issues is an effective approach to being able to feel better about yourself. You may not realize how much your experiences, early childhood, and trauma may be impacting how you feel about yourself. Body image therapy can help you work through these experiences and challenge the beliefs you hold about yourself. 

Start working with a body image therapist in Utah 

Oh hey! As it turns out, I am a body image therapist and would love to help you heal. You don’t have to keep hating your body and make peace with it instead. At this Utah County Counseling Clinic, I offer in-person therapy in my office in Spanish Fork

Through online therapy in Utah, I can work with you wherever you are located in Utah. We can work together if you are in St. George, Logan, or Salt Lake City. Richfield? Panguitch? I got you. 

How to begin body image therapy?

1. Book a free 15-minute phone consultation

2. Complete online forms and schedule the first session with a mental health expert

3. Begin body image therapy

Other mental health services at Maple Canyon Therapy

Body image therapy isn’t the only mental health service I provide at this Utah Counseling Center. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include anxiety therapy, EMDR and trauma therapy, eating disorder treatment, and binge eating disorder treatment in Utah.

About the Author

Ashlee Hunt is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and owner of Maple Canyon Therapy in Spanish Fork, Utah. Ashlee is a body image therapist specializing in body image issues. She is passionate about helping women get to a better place with their bodies by learning to use body kindness and body respect. Ashlee wants to instill hope into women that they don’t have to spend their lives hating their bodies but can stop thinking about them. Ashlee holds two bachelor's degrees, one in psychology, and one in family life and human development, from Southern Utah University in Cedar City, Utah. She received her Masters in Social Work from Utah State University in Logan, Utah. Ashlee has helped many women have more self-compassion and improve their body image.

5 Things I Would Never Do As An Eating Disorder Therapist

Have you seen the Tiktok trend of professionals in various fields sharing the top 5 things they would never do because of what they know as experts in their chosen field? Instead, I decided to jump on that bandwagon by sharing it all with you in blog form. I want to ensure that you understand this is not to sound self-righteous or above anyone else. Ironically, I have previously done all of these because I’m no better than anyone else. My education, experience, and my incredible clients have helped me understand why these areas are detrimental. If these are things you are doing or have done, allow some self-compassion. You haven’t known any better, and that’s ok. If you look at this list and scoff and think I’m inspiring laziness or anti-health, that’s ok too. This is your journey and your experience, and I hope you find whatever it is you need to find. 

Eating disorders are complex conditions; how often have you heard me say that? Here’s to repeating it. Different factors make someone vulnerable to developing an eating disorder, and certain factors might protect someone from developing an eating disorder. I want to share with you the things I hope I would never do to help protect others from developing eating disorders. 

As an Eating disorder Therapist, I would never….

1. Make negative comments about my body or comment on others’ bodies.

When I ask my clients about the history of their body-image issues, they either know right away, or they get a little pensive and recall comments their parents, grandparents, friends, etc., have made about their bodies or others' bodies. Negative comments about your body might seem only to be hurting you, but it’s actually impacting the people around you. This opens up the idea that if you don’t like your body, then maybe there is something wrong with your body too. Not only that, but it emphasizes the importance of appearance and bodies as a whole. We are all much more than our bodies, and moving beyond this would drastically improve body image as a whole. 

You don’t have to be stoked about your body, you don’t have to be stoked about other people's bodies; you can wish you had someone else's body, but please don’t say those things out loud. Our words and language truly matter. As women, we have more to bond about than how much we hate our bodies. 

2. Label foods as good or bad

Gone are the days when we need to villainize and demonize food. Food is just food. Sugar is not addictive, and carbs aren’t “going to make you fat”  Food isn’t about morals and doesn’t need to be labeled as good or bad. There is no holy and perfect food that fits all the requirements for all the right times. If you were on a deserted island, you would be better off having a stash of ice cream than a stash of carrots. Having flexibility around food is so important for physical and mental well-being. Labeling foods as bad increases fear and guilt around eating them. We don’t need to keep passing on the message that food is good or bad. Focusing more on intuitive eating and making peace with food is the most valuable approach. 

3. Engage in dieting behaviors

I know someone I love and care about who told me they have never been much of a dieter, yet they happen to be one of the biggest dieters I have ever met. There are plenty of diets out there; just because you aren’t following a formal diet doesn’t mean you are not engaging in dieting. Intentionally restricting food intake or variety for weight loss is dieting. Avoiding sugar or having position control in hopes of losing weight is a form of dieting. The dangers of dieting are that it is disordered eating and leads to the development of eating disorders. Dieting leads to decreased self-esteem,  increased weight gain (Ironic, isn’t it?), slowed metabolism, mood irritability, and much more. There is evidence to suggest that one in four dieters will go on to develop an obsessive relationship with food and meet the criteria for an eating disorder. Dieting is not good for physical health or mental health. 

4. Make rules about sizes, weight, and clothing.

I don’t know that I have ever worked with a woman in eating disorder treatment that didn’t have some sort of rule around size or weight. They may have denied at first t they had any rules, but upon further exploration, they realized they put restrictions on the sizes of clothing they were allowed to wear. This means if their body changed at all to a different size, this wasn’t ok, and they had somehow to manipulate their weight to a smaller size of clothing. The number on the inside of jeans holds so much power over the women I work with that it is heartbreaking. It’s hard work to change their beliefs and mindset about what is ok regarding clothing sizes. The same thing applies to weight. Somehow there is a certain number that is a “good” or “healthy” number to be at, and anything above it is not ok. I remember learning as a young girl that “120” was a good weight for a woman to be. This is completely realistic for probably the majority of women. Talking about numbers and weight is also something I hope that I never ever do. 

Aside from clothing sizes, I hope I never make rules for anyone about what kind of clothing they should wear. Every parent is allowed to implement guidelines and a dress code around clothing, but if it’s fueled by the desire for thinness, hiding body parts, or because of weight, that’s not cool. If a woman of any size wants to wear a crop top, she can. If a woman wants to wear shorts to keep her body cool, she can. We must accept that all bodies are good and deserve to be comfortable. 

5. Share jokes about eating disorder behaviors 

It is never funny to make jokes about eating disorder behaviors. Ever. Joking about purging or restricting is not ok, and it will never be funny. Maybe this comes across as harsh, but I’m telling you because I want you to stop doing it. You have no idea how painful and scary it is to have an eating disorder. Eating disorders thrive in secrecy and are easy to be kept hidden.  There is no good kind of eating disorder. Eating disorders impact men and women of any size and are always harmful. You don’t know the people around you that are struggling with an eating disorder and disordered eating. Making light of their experience is painful and teaches them you aren’t a safe person. It’s ok for you not to understand an eating disorder, but it doesn’t make a serious mental health struggle something to make a joke about. As a teenager, I made jokes about eating disorder behaviors and deeply regretted it. It’s one of those things that I struggle not to ruminate on because I know how horrible it was to make a joke about this mental health condition. Learn from my mistakes and don’t make jokes about them. 

Begin eating disorder treatment and start working with an eating disorder therapist near Provo, Utah

If you struggle with an eating disorder or disordered eating, you don’t have to try to figure it out alone. I know your relationship with food and body image issues doesn’t have a quick fix. Recovering from an eating disorder is possible, and eating disorder therapy can help. I have experience in training in helping women be more accepting of their bodies and less anxious around food. This Utah Counseling Clinic has an eating disorder therapist to help! To begin therapy:

1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation

2. Meet with a mental health professional

3. Begin eating disorder therapy

Online Eating Disorder Therapy in Utah

As a therapist licensed in Utah, I can work with you in person in my office in Spanish Fork, but I can also work with you from anywhere in Utah through online therapy in Utah. This means if you are located in Logan, St. George, or Salt Lake City, we can still work together for you to meet your mental health goals.

Other Counseling Services offered at Maple Canyon Therapy 

I work with more than just women who struggle with eating disorders at this Northern Utah Counseling Center. Other Services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include anxiety treatment, body image therapy, binge eating disorder treatment, EMDR, and trauma therapy.

About the Author 

Ashlee Hunt is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, eating disorder therapist, and owner of Maple Canyon Therapy Services in Utah. Ashlee has two bachelor’s degrees, a psychology degree, a Family Life and Human Development Degree from Southern Utah University, and a master’s degree in social work from Utah State University. Ashlee is passionate about treating eating disorders and working with women who struggle with: body image issues, disordered eating, and binge eating disorder. She utilizes EMDR for eating disorders to help her clients in eating disorder recovery. She also helps women who struggle with: symptoms of anxiety, including high-functioning anxiety and perfectionism. Ashlee believes in intuitive eating for eating disorder recovery and utilizes a Health At Every Size Approach in providing care to her clients. 

Other Blog Posts You May Find Helpful:

• 5 Reasons To Not Compliment Weight Loss: Advice From an Eating Disorder Therapist

• 5 Things You Should Know About Eating Disorders: Advice From An Eating Disorder Therapist

• Eating Disorder Treatment: You Deserve It.

• What You Think You Know About Eating Disorders is Probably Wrong

How Long Will I Need Anxiety Therapy?

The women I work with are often high-achieving and hardworking. They are used to getting things done in an efficient way and doing it well. These attributes make a significant impact on what they can get out of going to therapy. I love working with these women because they are dedicated and dependable, and they will do whatever it takes to find relief from their anxiety. 

One of the challenges of working with women with anxiety is the timeline they expect to get results and be done with therapy. I tell my clients to plan on a year of weekly therapy before considering ending it or tapering down sessions. Between you and I, a year is even know that long of a time, and most people need even longer. 

Maple Canyon Therapy’s approach to anxiety therapy

As a therapist, I want my clients to feel better as quickly as possible. I feel that the weight on my shoulders is sometimes heavier than I should, but that’s because I want it so badly for you. I have been in that position, and I get how horrible it feels to be scared, nervous, and anxious. More than I want fast results for my clients, I want you to feel better long term. I want you to be equipped with the skills to manage your anxiety long-term, and unfortunately for both of us, that is not a fast process. If you want relief from anxiety, plan on a year or more of therapy. 

The challenges my clients face with anxiety treatment 

You might look at that one-year timeline for anxiety treatment and think, “I bet I could do it in four months.” I’m begging you not to do that. It’s not realistic and honestly unfair to you and your therapist. The work that I do with clients involves going for the roots of their anxiety, and when you end treatment early because you feel like you should be done, it can cause more harm than good. Hopefully, you wouldn’t end a medical procedure before getting stitched back up, so please don’t end anxiety counseling before it’s through. I realize therapy is an investment. Again, I’ve been there and know it’s not an easy sacrifice, but the return on an investment will change your life forever if you go through all the steps. There are no shortcuts to healing trauma, anxiety, or eating disorders. Please make sure this is something feasible for you before you begin counseling. Allow yourself to work through the process without ending early. I understand that clients start feeling better because they have a few more skills than they did before, but sadly they have to return as a result. 

How do I know I am done with anxiety therapy?

Regardless of the timeline, ending anxiety treatment should be planned and talked about with your therapist. Feeling good for one week isn’t a good approach to ending treatment. Being able to consistently manage anxiety and stressors, along with having worked through past negative experiences and improved your beliefs about yourself, are all important goals to focus on before ending treatment.  I like to discuss with my clients a date we can work toward to taper down on therapy session frequency. In that process, we will chat about goals you have achieved and some that you would like to continue to work on. 

Start anxiety treatment near Provo, Utah today

If you struggle with anxiety, you don’t have to struggle alone. If you are like the women I work with, you’ve tried really hard to do it on your own. You don’t have to white-knuckle it through life. This Northern Utah Counseling Practice has an anxiety therapist who can help. If you haven’t worked with a therapist before, you might be surprised at how relieved you can find from your anxiety by doing so. To begin anxiety treatment, follow these steps:

1. Schedule a 15-minute phone consultation

2. Meet with a therapist for anxiety

3. Begin anxiety counseling

Online Therapy in Utah

I also provide anxiety treatment through online therapy in Utah. This means that wherever you are in Utah, I can work with you. I often work with clients in Logan, Salt Lake City, and St. George, Utah. 

Other mental health services at Maple Canyon Therapy 

Anxiety therapy isn’t the only mental health service provided at this Utah County Counseling Clinic. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include eating disorder therapy, birth trauma therapy, body image therapy, trauma therapy, and binge eating disorder treatment in Utah.

Other blog posts you may find helpful: 

• LDS Women and Anxiety: Thoughts From an Anxiety Therapist

• A Therapist’s Top 5 Tips For Calming Down 

• You Might Never Be Fully Ready: Why Try Therapy Anyway

• Why Therapy Sucks: A Therapist's Perspective

• 4 Reasons Why You Should Attend Therapy Every Week

• 6 Reasons Why Therapy Hasn't Worked

About the Author

Ashlee Hunt is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and owner of Maple Canyon Therapy Services. Ashlee holds two bachelor’s degrees from Southern Utah University, including a bachelor's in Psychology and a Bachelor's in Family Life and Human Development. Ashlee completed her master of Social Work at Utah State University. Ashlee provides individual therapy in-person in Spanish Fork, Utah, and online counseling for Utah residents Ashlee specializes in treating women with symptoms of anxiety, including LDS women with anxiety, high-functioning anxiety, and perfectionism. She also utilizes an EMDR approach to help clients manage symptoms of anxiety.

Anxiety Therapy: What Should I Expect?

Most of the women I work with struggle with some level of anxiety whether they realize it yet or not. These women like to be prepared for any situation. If you relate to having anxiety you are probably the one studying menus online before going to a restaurant, looking up the address to a job interview well in advance so you know how to get there, and looking over all your assignments for the semester on your first day of class. Maybe that’s not you to a T but I do know you like to be prepared. If you’re going to start anxiety treatment you want to know what to expect and what it will be like. I’m here to give you a heads-up of what you can expect from the process so you aren’t caught off guard. 

What is anxiety therapy?

You and I can talk about anything in these sessions. In fact, it’s pretty common to come into therapy and think we will only be focusing on anxiety but it ends up being directed at your relationships, past experiences, and beliefs about yourself. During your first session, I want to be able to get to know you and what you are struggling with. I will probably ask you a lot of questions about yourself and your anxiety. Looking at your history with anxiety is important in knowing how to treat it and help you get feeling better. A balance of helping you learn to cope with your anxiety, identify triggers, and what makes anxiety worse along with digging deep into your life experiences that may have contributed to your developing anxiety is important. Anxiety is often a symptom of something else. Yes, some of us are wired to be a bit more anxious than others because that’s part of our temperaments but when anxiety feels unmanageable, there’s more to it than we think. There are sessions where you may want to focus on something different entirely, and that’s great! We don’t only have to talk about your anxiety because there are other parts to you besides your anxiety, and this is something I want to help you understand in anxiety therapy. 

Does anxiety therapy even help?

The goal for me as an anxiety therapist is to help my clients find relief from their anxiety and be able to function in their lives much better than they used to. I definitely wouldn’t be offering anxiety therapy if there wasn’t a wide range of evidence-based practices that work to improve anxiety. It absolutely does and will work but it’s also important to recognize some important aspects of anxiety treatment. It takes practicing the coping skills and approaches we talk about in our sessions outside of sessions. Finding relief from anxiety requires effort and work and the more you work for it the more results you will get. It’s also important to note that we can never make anxiety go away forever. You will feel anxiety again in your life no matter how much therapy you go to but the hope is that it will have much less power over you, won’t last as long, and you will be better able to cope with it when it happens. Anxiety treatment absolutely helps. 

Will you ask me to take anxiety medication?

I am pretty neutral when it comes to whether my clients take medication for the most part. If you are against taking medication, I’m not here to force you to take it. I respect and want what you want. Medication can be a helpful tool and can help people get to a better place mentally. It doesn’t mean you have to take it. If I see you are struggling and feeling overwhelmed in the process, we might talk about medication as one of the tools to use in dealing with anxiety but whether you want to utilize it or not is totally up to you. 

Online Anxiety Therapy in Utah

I love doing anxiety therapy through online therapy in Utah.  People worry that if therapy is online that it’s not as effective as in-person therapy, but that’s a big fat myth. I was doing online therapy before the pandemic started, where it was common practice, and it’s always been effective. I love it for those that struggle with anxiety because they are often more comfortable in their own house. They don’t have to worry about finding my office or how they should dress etc. I want my clients to be as comfortable as possible doing therapy. If you are hesitant about going to therapy and have been putting it off, you should try online therapy. It’s just as good for anxiety treatment, I pinky promise. 

Online counseling also means that wherever you are located in Utah, I am able to work with you. I work with clients in Logan, Salt Lake City, Heber, St. George, Cedar City, and more.

Start anxiety treatment near Provo, Utah

I promise you don’t have to feel anxious and overwhelmed constantly. You might not know anything different, but this Northern Utah counseling practice has an anxiety therapist specializing in treating anxiety that can help you. To begin therapy, follow these steps:

1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation

2. Complete online forms and schedule the first appointment with a therapist for anxiety

3. Begin anxiety therapy! 

Other mental health services are provided near Provo, Utah

Anxiety therapy isn’t the only counseling service this Utah County counseling clinic provides. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include birth trauma therapy, body image therapy, trauma therapy, binge eating disorder treatment, and eating disorder therapy in Utah.

About the Author

Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and owner of Maple Canyon Therapy near Provo, Utah. Ashlee has a bachelor’s degree in psychology and a bachelor’s degree in family life and human development from Southern Utah University. She received her masters in social work from Utah State University. Ashlee has worked with women with anxiety in various treatment settings but loves working with women on an outpatient basis. She treats women with social anxiety, performance anxiety, dating anxiety, and high-functioning anxiety. When Ashlee isn’t doing therapy, she enjoys summers at Splash Summit Water Park in Provo.

Other blog posts from Maple Canyon Therapy You Might Find Helpful:

• How Do I Know If I Need to Go to Therapy?

• 4 Misconceptions About Therapists

• 6 Signs You Are A Perfectionist

• 5 Things Not To Say To Someone With Anxiety: Advice From an Anxiety Therapist

• 5 Ways To Deal With Dating Anxiety: Tips From an Anxiety Therapist

• What is High Functioning Anxiety?

• LDS Women and Anxiety: Thoughts From an Anxiety Therapist

How Do I Know If I Need to Go to Therapy?

Reaching out for help and deciding to go to therapy is a difficult decision to make. Often times when I meet my clients for the first time they are feeling anxious about being there in therapy. My clients don’t know what to expect and even have the fear that I as their therapist, will think they don’t need therapy or just the opposite that they are too much to handle. 

I totally understand the fear that a therapist will dismiss your problems as insignificant or share confusion on why you thought you needed therapy in the first place. I want you to know I’ve been in practice for almost a decade, and not even once has that thought crossed my mind with a client. Never have I had a client sit in front of me, and I have considered that they didn’t actually need or deserve to be there in therapy. If you want help and to improve your life, you deserve to be in therapy. 

There are other signs or symptoms you may experience in your life that might show you could benefit from attending therapy. I would like to share with you some but not all of what those may be. 

You want to go to therapy 

First a foremost if you want to go to therapy, you should go to therapy. People that voluntarily want to go to therapy and are willing to do whatever it takes to get feeling better are the ones that benefit the most from therapy. If you’ve ever been curious about therapy and wondered if it’s for you, it probably is. Therapy is for everyone. Therapy doesn’t mean you are crazy or mentally unstable. Therapy can be helpful for anyone at different stages of their lives. It’s easy to talk ourselves out of getting help or think what you are struggling with isn’t bad enough but honestly, it's better to get help before it gets too bad or overwhelming. 

You are interested in improving your life

I may be biased but I believe one of the best tools for improving your life is therapy. Self-help books are great and I recommend them with the therapy process but it’s hard to work on things all on your own. Therapy allows you to have a third party share their perspective on your life and blind spots you may be missing. It’s an opportunity for you to heal from past experiences and negative beliefs that you may not even realize are impacting your life. It’s easy to tell ourselves that we are over past experiences and they don’t impact us anymore but that’s not always true. Regardless, I believe those I work with deserve to have the best life they possibly can without the past hanging over their heads. 

You want to improve your relationships 

It is sometimes surprising to people that individual therapy can have a big fat impact on our relationships for the better. I am not a couples therapist but I see it all the time that as my clients work through their past and trauma they have better relationships with their partners and family members. When they are feeling better about themselves and their lives, they have more room and opportunities to connect with loved ones. My clients also don’t always realize how much of their past experiences carry over into how they respond in their present relationships. Even when you know your relationship needs the help of a couples of therapist, it still greatly benefits you also to be working on yourself as an individual. 

You find it difficult to cope with symptoms of anxiety

It’s a struggle when life suddenly feels more difficult than it used to. Sometimes it’s confusing why the way you used to deal with stress doesn’t work anymore. My clients have shared confusion in the past on why things that happened a long time ago that haven’t bothered them in a long time are suddenly bothering them again. It’s hard when life surprises you with new challenges. This is pretty normal for the women I work with and for those that have experienced trauma without realizing it was trauma. Therapy can help you work through the things that are bothering you and find new ways to cope with stress. 

You’re going through a hard time

There are many difficult things to go through as a human. You may have experienced the death of someone you love, stress at work, or a strained relationship with a family member or friend, and you may feel more anxious and sad. All of these are hard things to cope with on your own. Seeing a therapist can make a big difference if you are going through a hard time. Sometimes it even helps to say what you are struggling with and have a trained therapist help you through it. I truly wish everyone could go to therapy or give it a try if they have the financial means to do so. It’s surprising how much it makes a difference in your life. If you are thinking about going to therapy, I hope you'll take the risk and try it. When you find a good therapist that knows how to treat what you are struggling with it can be absolutely life-changing. 

Looking for anxiety therapy near Provo, Utah

You don’t have to keep dealing with feelings of anxiousness. Anxiety therapy can help your life feel more manageable. This Provo Utah area counseling clinic has an anxiety therapist specializing in anxiety treatment. To begin anxiety therapy, follow the steps below:

1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation

2. Complete online forms and schedule the first session with a therapist for anxiety

3. Begin therapy

Other mental health services provided near Provo, Utah

Anxiety therapy isn’t the only therapy service provided at this Northern Utah Counseling Clinic. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include trauma therapy, eating disorder therapy, birth trauma therapy, body image therapy, and binge eating disorder treatment in Utah.

about the author

Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and owner of Maple Canyon Therapy in Utah County. Ashlee has a bachelor's degree in psychology and a bachelor’s in family life and human development from Utah State University. She received a master’s degree in social work from Utah State University. Ashlee enjoys working with women with high-functioning anxiety who are willing to do whatever it takes to feel better. She helps women with social anxiety, performance anxiety, and dating anxiety. When Ashlee isn’t in therapy, she is probably playing fetch with her Goldendoodle at the Spanish Fork Dog Park.

Other blog posts from Maple Canyon Therapy you might find helpful :

• You Might Never Be Fully Ready: Why You Should Try Therapy Anyway

• Why Therapy Sucks: A Therapist’s Perspective

• 4 Reasons Why You Should Attend Therapy Every Week

• The Power Of Therapy: You Can Feel Better

• The Delight Of Online Therapy: 4 Reasons To Try It

• Having Hope and Doing The Work In Therapy

4 Misconceptions About Therapists

You and I can be real with each other right? Sometimes being a therapist is a hard job but maybe not how you would think. People assume that it’s hard to hear people’s painful stories all day. That’s not hard for me. It’s an honor to be able to be considered safe enough for people to share that with. I love nothing more than to be able to extend compassion and help people heal from the worst experiences of their lives. The challenge sometimes is actually the misconceptions that therapists receive and because I am a therapist I get lumped into that. Part of the reason therapy is effective is because you don’t know everything about your therapist and while I would not change that sometimes it leads to misconceptions. 

Therapists just want to convince you that there's something wrong with you. 

Woof. Worst one ever. That’s actually the opposite of being true. Part of the reason I don’t take insurance is that they require you to have a diagnosis aka something wrong with you. I don’t think it’s fair to my clients. There’s a reason diagnoses are created and used but sometimes they aren’t helpful. I do talk with my clients especially the ones with eating disorders who are struggling to see the significance of their behavior about a diagnosis but I never want my clients to feel like there’s something wrong with them or that there is no hope of getting better. It’s not accurate at all and it’s not helpful. It’s also not my approach at all. Therapy is not only for mental illness. It’s for everyone. 

Therapists blame your family or childhood for your problems. 

This one is a real struggle for me because there is a lot of truth that our histories impact our present beliefs about ourselves and the world. There’s just no way around that being the truth. It’s a principle we experience all around in the world we live in. Cause and effect is a real principle. However, the goal of a therapist is not to blame the people you love and care about especially when the people in your life were doing their best in how they raised you. In therapy, we do make connections of when things started or what they are rooted in but the goal is not to blame or confront anyone for that but to find a way to heal from it while cultivating the type of relationship you want with family and friends. 

Therapists will convince you to leave your religion or church

I mean I can’t speak for all therapists on any of these honestly but for me no way dude. There’s not a chance I will ever tell you what to do with your spiritual or religious beliefs. It’s my job to help you identify your values and how to get your actions to line up with them so you can have a happier fulfilled life. There is absolutely no room anywhere in my heart to take away what is important to someone or to persuade them to abandon what’s important to them. I’m just not here for that. My personal values and beliefs have nothing to do with yours. I own mine and would never let them influence yours. 

Therapists will fill your head with crazy ideas

If you think this is me, then you are giving me way more credit than I deserve. You wanna know what my clients talk about in sessions: emotions, coping skills, how to be nice to themselves, ways to work through trauma, and if we are feeling really crazy, talk about restaurants we like to eat at. Again, I can’t speak for all therapists, but I think there is some room to challenge the fact that therapists have wild agendas and want to persuade you to do things that have no impact on our lives. I am here for you, and that’s it. I want you to be happy, healthy, and safe, and want to provide you with research tools that have already been proven to help you get there. 

Finding a therapist that meets your needs is important. Not every therapist is going to be the right fit but when you do find the right therapist for you, it can make a big difference. It’s important to be able to challenge these myths and misconceptions you might have about therapists in order to get the help that you deserve. Therapists aren’t here to persuade you of anything, blame your family, make you think you’re flawed, or be critical of your beliefs. 

Looking for an anxiety therapist and located in Utah?

If you are struggling with anxiety and worry and feel like it’s taking over your life, therapy can help. You don’t have to live that way, and you can find relief from the knots in your stomach. This Utah County counseling clinic has an anxiety therapist specializing in anxiety treatment that can help. To begin counseling, follow the steps below:

1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation

2. Meet with a therapist for anxiety

3. Begin feeling better

Online Therapy in Utah

I know it’s hard to navigate your busy schedule, and maybe you don’t feel like you deserve to do something for yourself, like therapy. You deserve help and focus on your needs, and I want to make it convenient for you by offering online therapy in Utah. Online therapy is convenient, secure, and just as effective as in-person therapy.

Online counseling allows me to work with you if you are in Logan, Salt Lake City, St. George, Cedar City, Heber, and more.

Other mental health services at Maple Canyon Therapy

Anxiety therapy isn’t the only counseling service provided at this Northern Utah Counseling Center. Other mental services that Maple Canyon Therapy provides are eating disorder therapy, body image therapy, binge eating disorder treatment, trauma therapy, and birth trauma therapy in Utah.

About the Author

Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and owner of Maple Canyon Therapy in Northern Utah. She has a bachelor’s degree in psychology and a bachelor’s degree in family life and human development from Southern Utah University. Ashlee has a master’s degree in social work from Utah State University. She has been practicing therapy for nearly a decade and enjoys working with women with anxiety to help them finally have peace. She helps women with high-functioning anxiety, dating anxiety, performance anxiety, and social anxiety. When Ashlee isn’t doing therapy, she enjoys spending time with her Goldendoodles who enjoy walks on the Spanish Fork River Trail.

Other blog posts or resources you may find helpful

• How Couples Therapy Can Be Helpful in Eating Disorder Recovery

• How Eating Disorders Impact Your Relationship

• EMDR Online Therapy: Here’s What You Should Know

• 5 Things To Look For In An Eating Disorder Therapist

Body Image Issues: 4 Ways to Cope

You and I have talked about before how it seems like warmer weather brings on bad body image. For some people, it is easier to hide in layers of clothing that are cozy and comfortable, and when the weather warms up, the layers have to be shed. The women I work with often want to hide their bodies and when temperatures spike it feels like they have no choice but to expose more of themselves than they want to. I get it. I imagine it’s difficult to be in this struggle and in your own skin. There’s nothing wrong with you for feeling the way you do. 

Body image issues are a struggle for the majority of women. It’s a sad truth, and I wish it weren’t that way, but it is. It’s hard not to struggle with body image when we live in a world that is obsessed with women’s bodies being thin, sculpted, and beautiful. I’m sure you have your own experiences personally where perhaps someone in your life made comments about your body and appearance that made you realize you should be worried about what you look like. These are challenging experiences to let go of.  Much of the media that we experience is filtered images of women that don’t even look the way we think they do.

Dealing with body image issues is hard

We also don’t have many people out there preaching body positivity and radical acceptance of your body. It’s still an unpopular movement to think of all bodies as good bodies that don’t need to be altered or shrunk. Unfortunately, many women attempt to improve their body image by losing weight or changing their image. You may be surprised to know that body image is contingent upon your weight, the size of your jeans, or the color of your hair. Changing all of that isn’t going to make a long-term difference in how you feel about your body. There are other ways to manage body image.

Before I give you some tips on how to cope with your body image, I want to tell you that you don’t have to feel guilty or stupid because you don’t like your body. I know when we open up about how we think about our appearance, loved ones might dismiss these emotions or even make us feel bad for feeling that way. You don’t need to feel embarrassed or ashamed because this is your struggle. You are already struggling enough and don’t need to feel worse. Let’s talk about what might help you feel better. 

Ways to cope with body image issues:

There are ways to help you deal with body image issues and not have to think about what your body looks like all the time. Here are some suggestions on ways to cope with body image:

Stop looking in the mirror 

Be honest with yourself about how long you are spending looking at yourself in the mirror, checking your appearance, or making sure your clothes aren’t showing too much. There is no moral value in you using a mirror at all BUT there’s a good chance that you are feeling terrible about yourself the more you body check in the mirror. It’s fine to use a mirror but I would certainly work on decreasing how many times you are checking out your appearance in the mirror. Believe it or not, the act of checking yourself out over and over in the mirror increases feelings of depression and anxiety. 

Reexamine who you follow on social media

Social media is great for connecting with other people and maintaining and building relationships. It opens up more opportunities to have connections regardless of physical distance. It can be a wonderful tool and support for people. It can also be a downfall. If you are following people that are body-focused regardless of their body size, people that are counting their macros or are on a “health” journey, it will likely lead to you thinking more about your body and what you eat then is probably helpful. I would urge you to pay attention to the accounts you are following and notice how you are feeling after scrolling. It’s ok to mute and unfollow anyone who makes you feel negative about yourself, and in fact, I would encourage you to do just that. 

Dress comfortably and get rid of clothes that don’t fit

This may seem to be pretty obvious but the way you dress matters. If you are constantly wearing clothes that are too big or too small, it’s going to keep you focused on your body size. You absolutely do not deserve to be or feel uncomfortable in your clothes. That may mean getting a different size of clothes. You might have unspoken rules in your head about what your size is allowed to be or you may feel anxiety about changing sizes, I want you to know it’s normal, and it’s ok. When you get the courage to do it, I would recommend getting rid of the clothes that don’t fit you anymore that have been hanging in your closet for “one day”. Take someone you trust shopping with you and let them pick the sizes for you so you don’t have to see them. Finding clothes that fit you properly is important when coping with a negative body image. 

Practice gratitude for your body

I tell all of my clients who are struggling with their body image that my goal is not to get them to love every part of their bodies. My goal is to get you to have respect and gratitude for your body. I want you to be able to move to a place of acceptance of what your body is rather than trying to get your approval of it. I don’t expect you to hold any body-love rallies, but I want you to think about your appearance much less than you are now. One of the tools to do this is finding things you are grateful for about your body. As they say, “Your body is an instrument, not an ornament”. Focusing less on what it looks like and more so on what allows you to do can help you feel more positively about your body. 

Body-image therapy can help

Using coping skills might not cure your bad body image, so don’t beat yourself up if you still struggle at times. These are tools to help you cope with how you feel about your body and to work towards having a more positive relationship with yourself. Therapy is a critical tool in helping you really dig in and rewrite the story of what you tell yourself about your body. Therapy is also an important step in healing from the past messages you’ve been given about yourself and your body. It’s important to address the underlying issues that have contributed to an emphasis on your body and help you develop a healthier view of yourself.

Trauma, comments made by others, and early childhood experiences contribute to developing a negative view of your body. It might seem like something you should be able to shake off, but our brains aren’t wired that way. Many women feel embarrassed that they care about something as “stupid” as what their body looks like. They have shared that they’ve tried to talk about it with other people and it has been minimized or they have been reassured that they look good, an dthere’s nothing wrong with their bodies. They begin to wonder if something is wrong with them because the words of their loved ones fall flat. The truth is nobody is going to be able to persuade your or convince you with words that your body is ok. The most important part of healing is you learn to accept yourself and your body for what it is.

Body image therapy is not just learning coping skills, but it’s actually learning to find healing from the comments people have made about your body that have been painful. Body image therapy is learning to respect your body and treat it with kindness. It doesn’t mean you’re always going to be stoked to look in the mirror or you’re going to love what you look like. The most important thing you can learn is how to show gratitude and kindness regardless of how you feel about your appearance. The overall goal is to feel better about yourself, which you can expect to focus on in therapy.

Start working with a body image therapist near Provo, Utah

You don’t have to keep hating your body forever. Therapy can help you stop the war you have with your body. This Provo Utah Area Counseling Clinic has a body image therapist that can help! To begin body image therapy, follow the steps below:

1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation with Ashlee Hunt

2. Complete online forms and book the first session with a mental health expert

3. Begin body image therapy

Other mental Health Services Provided by Maple Canyon Therapy

Body image therapy isn’t the only service I provide at this Utah County Counseling Clinic. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy Services include anxiety treatment, EMDR and Trauma Therapy, Eating Disorder Therapy, birth trauma therapy, and binge eating disorder treatment in Utah.

All services are available through online therapy in Utah. This means if you are located in St. George, Cedar City, Logan, or Heber City, I can still help you.

About the Author

Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and owner of Maple Canyon Therapy Services in Spanish fork, Utah. Ashlee holds a bachelor’s degree in psychology, a bachelor’s degree in family life and human development from Southern Utah University, and a masters in social work from Utah State University. She has worked with women with eating disorders and body image issues since she was a graduate student. Ashlee is passionate about working with women who are committed to developing a healthier view of themselves, food, and their bodies.

Other helpful blog posts from Maple Canyon Therapy Services:

• 4 REASONS NOT TO APOLOGIZE FOR YOUR BODY

• WARMER WEATHER AND BAD BODY IMAGE

• SELF-COMPASSION: WHY YOU NEED IT AND WAYS TO PRACTICE IT

• WHY YOU SHOULDN’T COMMENT ON ANYONE’S BODY

• 5 REASONS NOT TO COMPLIMENT WEIGHT LOSS

4 Tips to Recover From a Binge From an Eating Disorder Therapist

If you struggle with binge eating disorder, I am sure there have been mornings you have woken up feeling immense physical discomfort and swimming in an ocean of shame. You likely start berating yourself for not having enough self-control and wonder what is wrong with you that you keep doing this. You feel terrible, and you hate feeling this way. What do you do with all of these feelings, and how do you recover from a binge?

Give yourself a hefty dose of self-compassion 

If you were sitting on my couch in my office, I would validate how you are feeling and let you know that you are ok. There’s nothing wrong with you. It’s not because you don’t have self-control, and it’s ok that you binged. I hope that you would give that same response to a friend or someone that you care about, so can you give that response to yourself? Being mean to yourself actually isn’t very motivational contrary to what you might think. When we are treated negatively, it doesn’t yield long-term positive results. Give yourself a break no matter how many times you have binged. You’re allowed to feel sad and upset, AND it’s also true that you’re doing your best. I’m sure you don’t want to binge, and there is likely a deeper reason for why you’re responding this way. 

Refuse the temptation to start restricting 

When you are physically uncomfortable and full of self-hatred, you might be tempted to commit to restricting, avoiding foods, and diet. Girl, please don’t do this. You might not realize this but restricting food either physically or mentally is what leads to binge eating. People tell themselves it's because they just don’t have enough self-control, when the truth is it’s because you have a history of dieting or restricting food. Even telling yourself that foods are bad for you and avoiding them is a form of restriction. You might be tempted to skip your next meal because you’re uncomfortable and probably really don’t feel up to eating sometimes. I would encourage you to eat something to get back into regular eating. Restricting with just starting the binge eating cycle all over again. 

Provide yourself with self-care

You probably want to do the opposite of giving yourself self-care after a binge, but this is when you need it the most. Hydrate your body. Get some rest. Take a bath. Go on a walk. Listen to music. Whatever it is for you that is a form of self-care, please do it. Your body and you remind have been through a lot in a binge, and they need the time and space to recover. You don’t need to punish yourself for binging but give yourself a break. It doesn’t matter if you think you deserve it or not. You need a little extra care right now. 

Avoid isolation and connect

It can be tempting to isolate yourself from others after a binge. You feel like hot garbage physically and emotionally. You aren’t hot garbage, though, and you deserve to be loved. You might want to keep your distance from other people and isolate yourself. This isn’t the time to turn down spending time with friends or connecting with others. This is the time that you need connection the most. Allow yourself to spend time with people you care about and those who care about you. You are more likely to have a successful recovery from a binge when you reach out for support. Feeling shame for binging will make you feel like you can’t tell anyone because they will judge you. I would encourage you to find someone that is safe and that you trust to tell how you’re feeling. 

You can overcome binge eating disorder

Overcoming binge eating can be difficult. I want you to know that it’s ok that you’re struggling and that you deserve to feel better. You can also have the hope that you will get better, and you don’t have to stay in this cycle of binging forever. There are definitely possibilities for recovering from binge eating disorder. Therapy can be something that can help you gain the tools and learn how to look deeper at things that you might not have realized contribute to your eating disorder.

Looking for Binge Eating Disorder Treatment and located in Utah?  

You don’t have to keep feeling uncomfortable and ashamed of yourself. Binge Eating Disorder Treatment can help you stop breaking the binge cycle. This Utah County Counseling Center has an eating disorder therapist specializing in Binge Eating Disorder Treatment. To begin therapy, follow the steps below:

1. Schedule a free-15 minute phone consultation

2. Meet with a binge eating disorder therapist

3. Begin eating disorder recovery

Binge Eating Disorder Treatment through online therapy in Utah

I know how important it is to have a therapist specializing in what you are struggling with, especially regarding eating disorder recovery. I want you to be able to connect with someone who really gets it. I also know parts of Utah don’t know how to have a therapist trained in treating eating disorders, and this is why I offer online therapy in Utah. This makes it so you can have access to an eating disorder therapist.

I work with clients all throughout Utah, including Salt Lake City, Logan, Heber, Cedar City, St. George, and more.

Other mental health services at Maple Canyon Therapy

Binge Eating Disorder Treatment isn’t the only counseling service provided at this Northern Utah Counseling Center. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include eating disorder therapy, EMDR therapy, Birth Trauma, anxiety therapy, and body image therapy.

About the Author

Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and owner of Maple Canyon Therapy in Utah County. She graduated from Southern Utah University with two bachelor’s degrees: psychology and family life and human development. Ashlee received her master’s degree from Utah State University. Ashlee has had an interest in eating disorders since a teen and having her first client at the counseling center at USU. She cares deeply about helping women be able to find peace with food and their bodies. Ashlee believes eating disorder recovery is completely possible with the help of a therapist and dietician. Outside of therapy, Ashlee loves finding plants to add to her collection from Sun River Gardens in Orem when she isn't being a therapist.

6 Signs You Are A Perfectionist

Back in the day when I was doing group therapy at an eating disorder treatment center, I remember leading a group on perfectionism. It was insightful to me and the women in it. Many of those women didn’t think they were perfectionists until after the group was over. They were surprised at how perfectionism can show up in different ways. Perfectionism can range from getting straight A’s to not being willing to do anything due to fear that it won’t be perfect. Perfectionism is different in everyone but the impact is negative regardless. 

Perfectionism is one of those things that people actually view as a good thing. People are more willing to share they’re a perfectionist than they are to admit they are depressed. It might seem more socially acceptable to be a perfectionist but at times we fail to see how damaging it is. Perfectionism can be paralyzing to people, which leads to increased anxiety and depression. Being high-achieving might seem like a good thing but sometimes we don’t realize the cost and toll it takes on us. 

There are many different signs of perfectionism. This is not a comprehensive list and just because you might relate to all of these doesn’t mean you aren’t a perfectionist. 

Signs of perfectionism

You avoid things you’re not good at

If you are someone that doesn’t believe you’ll be good at something then you avoid doing it at all costs. You might avoid it because you are afraid of looking stupid or not being seen as having it all together. This trait is something that perfectionists fail to see in themselves because they think they’re actually lazy or unmotivated. The truth is they are absolutely terrified of making a mistake or people knowing they’re not good at everything. 

Being average is unacceptable

I had a client tell me that thinking about being average “hurts their feelings”. They want to be good at everything. Getting anything less than an A feels like failure. They feel like they have to be above average at everything they do. Receiving any feedback or criticism feels like failure. If they don’t get a glowing evaluation at their job then they feel like a failure. It is completely unrealistic to be able to achieve high standards in all areas of life, and yet perfectionists feel they somehow have to. 

Doing anything imperfectly means you’re a failure of a person

Perfectionists don’t allow themselves to be human. They may be able to accept that other people make mistakes but they don’t allow themselves to do the same. When they fail to measure up to their own standards or make mistakes they view it as a failure. They don’t see themselves as separate from this and believe they are a failure of a person. Not measuring up often is accompanied by increased anxiety and depression. 

Seeing only flaws in your achievements

You might be a perfectionist if you only see the flaws in your achievements or accomplishments. Often nobody else will see these things but perfectionists see all of their mistakes People who are perfectionistic might be embarrassed or ashamed for anyone to see the things they’ve done because of this. It seems that no matter how much effort or work perfectionists put into something, it never quite measures up to the standard they have for themselves. 

Never feeling good enough

Perfectionists downright never feel that what they do is good enough. They are quick to point out what they could be doing better or what they could improve. It doesn’t matter how much praise or compassion is given to them they don’t think they deserve it because they are not perfect. Perfectionism is a black hole of there never being anything that makes you feel enough. 

Fear other people will see your mistakes

A perfectionist’s worst nightmare is that other people will see them as a failure. They are fearful people will see through them and believe they are incompetent and an imposter. Perfectionists don’t want to be put in situations where they aren’t able to do things competently because they don’t want others to see them as weak. Perfectionists will avoid being in situations where they might feel stupid or might be seen in a negative light. 

Perfectionism isn’t just about seeming put together and getting good grades. It’s about struggling with self-esteem and anxiety for many. Perfectionists engage in many of their tendencies as a way of feeling better about themselves. Perfectionistic behavior is also about trying to manage anxiety but it pays a price on your emotional well-being. 

Anxiety Therapy can help with perfectionism 

If you read this blog and found yourself identifying with having perfectionistic behaviors, the best thing you can do for yourself is to seek out therapy. Therapy can help you find different ways to cope with your emotions and feel better about yourself. You don’t have to feel suffocated by perfectionism. You can feel better about yourself. 

Ready to start anxiety therapy in Utah?

You can move beyond perfectionism, and anxiety therapy can help. This Utah County Counseling Center has an anxiety therapist specializing in therapy for perfectionism. To begin therapy, follow the steps below:

1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation

2. Meet with a therapist for anxiety

3. Find freedom from perfectionism

Online anxiety therapy in Utah

It’s tough to prioritize yourself and take time from your schedule to see a therapist. I know how much therapy can make a difference and change your life. This is why I offer online therapy in Utah. Online counseling is a face-to-face video session that’s equally to in-person therapy but much more convenient.

Telehealth allows me to work with clients in Salt Lake City, St. George, Cedar City, Logan, Heber, and more.

Other mental health services at maple canyon therapy

Anxiety therapy isn’t the only counseling service offered at this Utah Counseling Practice. Other mental health services include body image therapy, eating disorder therapy, binge eating disorder treatment, birth trauma therapy, and trauma therapy in Utah.

5 Things Not To Say To Someone With Anxiety: Advice From an Anxiety Therapist

If you are someone that struggles with anxiety, you’ve likely been given unhelpful advice at times on how to manage it. Most people give this advice because they don’t truly understand the depth of anxiety because they’ve never experienced it themselves, or they’re uncomfortable with emotions that aren’t deemed positive. If you are reading this and you love someone that struggles with anxiety I want to give you a little insight about anxiety. 

Anxiety is not something that can be controlled with a flip of a switch. Just because someone experiences anxiety it doesn’t mean they aren’t trying or they are bringing it on themselves. Our brains are complicated sometimes, and each person has to find what works for them. If you have a loved one that experiences anxiety, I would certainly invite you to go inward on what’s happening for you when you know they are feeling anxious. Are you uncomfortable with their anxiety? Do you not understand their anxiety? Are you desperate to make them feel better? Whatever it is you need to understand that their anxiety isn’t about you. You cannot manage someone else's anxiety for them but there are things you can do to be supportive and helpful. Some of the things you might say to someone with anxiety aren’t supportive and can be really invalidating. Let me introduce you to some. 

“Just try not to worry about it” 

I would guess if you are using this statement you’re probably pretty uncomfortable with someone’s anxiety. As I said before people don’t have the ability to turn off their brains and simply stop worrying about something. I assure you that anxiety is already uncomfortable and overwhelming enough that if this was an option for people they would have done it long ago. Instead of asking your loved one not to worry about it try, “What can I do to help support you right now?” 

“Calm down” 

Those two words do not activate the parasympathetic nervous system (the part of the nervous system that calms). I’m sorry I don’t make the rules. Again using this statement is likely a result of your own discomfort, and maybe it’s time to own those feelings. Ironically, saying “Calm down” will have the opposite effect. It’s bound to make someone feel unheard and realize you are not a safe person to be open with about what your loved one is experiencing. Try “I’m here for you. You don’t have to do this alone” and then be present with them. 

“It’s all in your head” 

In my opinion, this is the worst one. Yes, anxiety begins in our brains so, of course, it’s in people's heads. This statement has another meaning and when people hear it they are not only invalidated but they feel crazy and as if they are making their anxiety up. I don’t think people want to be anxious. I work with women with anxiety, and they don’t enjoy the experience of feeling anxious, and they don’t want to feel crazy or believe that you think they’re making this up. Try instead, “Do you want me to listen, or would you like a distraction?” 

“You need to change your thoughts”

I will give you some credit if you’ve used this statement before. One approach to anxiety management for some people is to work on changing their thoughts. It’s not my favorite approach because it’s not always effective or worth someone’s energy to chase down all their thoughts and try to change them. The reason people fall into thought traps is likely because of past experiences. Those are the experiences that are worth focusing energy and time on healing. We are also missing the big part of the fact that anxiety is an emotion, not just a thought. Anxious thoughts can accompany anxiety but changing your thoughts doesn’t change an emotion. We cannot just turn off an emotion.  Try instead, “I am sure this is overwhelming for you. What can I do to help you cope?”

“Focus on praying and having faith”

This one. This response may be said with good intentions but my oh my is it a shaming one. Let me remind you that anxiety sometimes arrives outside of people’s control. When someone prays and tries to have faith and the anxiety doesn’t go away, they are led to believe it’s their fault. They must be doing something wrong if they’ve checked all the spiritual boxes and are still struggling. Prayer and faith can be a helpful tool for SOME people, but they aren’t the cure. Please don’t say this to anyone about any physical and emotional struggle. It’s not their fault that they have anxiety. Try saying, “I’m sure it’s hard to feel positive right now. What do you need from me?”

Please remember to be gentle with your people that have anxiety. Validating and being present with their emotions actually helps them get through the experience faster but doesn’t always mean it’s a quick and easy process. 

Anxiety therapy can help

Whether you struggle with anxiety or a loved one, anxiety therapy is the secret sauce. It’s actually not that big of a secret, but maybe you’re not quite a believer in counseling. If you don’t know how to help yourself or someone you love that struggles with anxiety, consider anxiety therapy. Going to therapy doesn’t mean you are crazy or that something is wrong with you but it does make a world of difference to work with a trained mental health professional. As a therapist, I have spent years studying mental health and how to help people struggling, and want you to know you are not beyond help if you are struggling. Anxiety therapy is an investment that you will not regret.

Start anxiety therapy near Provo, Utah

If you are struggling with anxiety and want help learning to cope with your emotions and work on the root of the problem, I can help. This Northern Utah Counseling Practice has a therapist for anxiety specializing in anxiety treatment. To begin therapy, follow the steps below:

1. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation

2. Complete online forms and meet with an anxiety therapist

3. Begin anxiety therapy

Work with an anxiety therapist online in Utah

I want to make therapy as accessible for you as possible. It’s not easy to take time out of your work and school schedule to meet with a therapist. I also know how important it is to prioritize your mental health, which is why I offer online therapy in Utah. It’s safe, convenient, and just as effective as in-person therapy.

Online therapy allows me to work with clients in Logan, Salt Lake City, St. George, Heber, Cedar City, and more.

Other mental health services at Maple Canyon Therapy

Anxiety therapy isn’t the only counseling service at this Utah County Counseling Clinic. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include binge eating disorder treatment, eating disorder therapy, birth trauma therapy, body image therapy, and trauma therapy in Utah.

About the Author

Ashlee Hunt is licensed clinical social worker in the state of Utah and owner of Maple Canyon Therapy in Northern Utah. Ashlee has two bachelors degrees in psychology and family life and human development from Southern Utah University. She has a masters in social work from Utah State University. Ashlee enjoys helping women who struggle with dating anxiety and high functioning anxiety find the relief they desperately deserve. She has been practicing therapy for almost a decade and enjoys the privilege of working with some of the loveliest people she has ever met. When Ashlee isn’t practicing therapy, she enjoys time outside and spends time at the North Park in Spanish Fork.