Your college student may have arrived home at Christmas break after not seeing them for a while and you notice something is off. They don’t seem quite like themselves. Your college student might be acting differently around food or you may have noticed changes in your weight. Are these eating disorder symptoms? Regardless, It can be concerning to see someone you love so much not responding quite like themselves. Eating disorders are often accompanied by depression and anxiety. Not only are you concerned about your college students eating habits but you are also worried about their mood.
If you suspect your college student is suffering from eating disorder symptoms, it can be alarming. College students tend to be vulnerable to developing eating disorders. You might feel panicked thinking about this and want to do something immediately. I admire the dedication and care that you have for your college student but there are things to consider prior to addressing your college student’s eating disorder with them.
Tips for talking to your college student about their eating disorder
Before bringing up your concerns to your college student, take a look at these tips in order to have an effective conversation with them. These conversations are tough to have and making sure that you go about it the right way can impact how your college student responds.
Share concerns about your college student
When talking to your college student about their eating disorder, share with them your concerns and why you feel that way. Make sure you are open in your approach and willing to listen to what they have to say. Understand that this is going to be a difficult thing for your college student to hear, and they might be uncomfortable talking about it.
Approach it with kindness and compassion
As anxious and worried as you might be about your college student’s overall health and well-being, make sure you are using kindness and compassion. They are more willing to be open and honest with you when they feel they are respected and your approach is coming from a place of love and understanding.
Describe the behaviors that you’ve observed
You don’t necessarily want to jump to conclusions about your college student having an eating disorder to them. Share with your college student the behaviors you’ve seen them show that you are concerned about. This gives them an opportunity to open up about what they are experiencing.
Show genuine support
Make sure that your college student knows that you are genuine and want to support them. They may not be open about their eating disorder when you bring it up the first time but they will be more willing to come to you when they might be ready for help.
Help your college student find a professional that can help
Eating disorder recovery requires professional help. Many people want to do it on their own because they’re embarrassed or feel like they should but this isn’t effective. Your college student deserves the help of a professional that knows how to help them with a complicated diagnosis. Keep in mind that your college student likely won’t be able to pay for therapy or other professionals and may need your help in doing so.
What not to do if you think your college student has an eating disorder
These are important things to know before talking to your college student. Using these approaches can make your college student less likely to reach out for help and can negatively impact the relationship.
Don’t make judgments
This may seem obvious but sometimes when we are speaking we don’t realize that it’s coming across as judgemental. Your college student might be feeling embarrassed about their eating disorder so be careful that the way you are communicating is not making them feel you are judging them. Don’t judge what they are doing with food or their behaviors.
Don’t use coercion or threats
You might be absolutely terrified about your college student continuing their eating disorder but don’t make threats. I’ve worked with parents before who have threatened to take away their college students' cars or make them drop out of college. I’m begging you not to do this. This is going to harm your relationship, and your college student isn’t going to want recovery from reasons that will help them long term.
Don’t make comments about their body
Not only should you not make derogatory comments about their body but any comments about their body are not helpful. If you think they look too thin or you’ve noticed they’ve gained weight, don’t say it. Don’t tell them they look unhealthy because that will also trigger them. Don’t compliment weight loss.
Don’t give recommendations about diet and exercise
You might want to give recommendations for your college student on what to eat and how to exercise. This is not a good option and will be triggering to them. Leave this up to an eating disorder dietitian to work with your college student. It will save your relationship and they will be getting specific guidance from a professional.
Eating disorder therapy is critical to eating disorder recovery
It’s so important to encourage your college student to attend therapy. Recovering from an eating disorder is a significant endeavor and utilizing a professional with the expertise and training will make a huge difference. There are many great therapists out there but many don’t have experience in treating eating disorders. Making sure your college student has the best chances for recovery means making sure they are working with an eating disorder therapist. Remember to be patient with this process as eating disorder recovery isn’t quick or easy. Therapy will change your life and make your life worth living fuller but know it will be challenging at times.
Begin working with an eating disorder therapist in Utah
You don’t have to keep struggling with an eating disorder. You can achieve full eating disorder recovery. Eating disorder therapy can help! This Utah Counseling Practice has an eating disorder therapist specializing in working with college students. To begin counseling follow the steps below:
Meet with a therapist for eating disorders
Start eating disorder recovery
Online Eating Disorder Therapy in Utah
When you are reaching out for help with your eating disorder, you want the assurance that the professional you work with knows exactly how to help. Eating disorders require specialized training and unfortunately, there are many parts of Utah that don’t have access to a therapist with this training in their town. This is why I offer online therapy in Utah. Online counseling is just as effective as in-person therapy but it means you don’t have to travel to see your therapist. The clients I work with love online treatment, and I think you will too.
Online eating disorder therapy means I work with people all over the state of Utah including St. George, Provo, Cedar City, Logan, Heber City, Salt Lake City, and more.
Other mental health services at Maple Canyon Therapy
Eating disorder therapy isn’t the only counseling service offered at this Utah Counseling Center. Other mental health services provided by Maple Canyon Therapy include EMDR therapy, Birth Trauma Therapy, Anxiety Therapy, Body Image Therapy, and Binge Eating Disorder Treatment. Sign up for a free phone consultation to see how I can help.
About the Author
Ashlee Hunt is a licensed clinical social worker and founder of Maple Canyon Therapy in Utah. Ashlee has a master's degree in social work from Utah State University. She holds two bachelor's degrees in psychology and, family life and human development from Southern Utah University. Ashlee started working with college students with eating disorders as a graduate student therapist at USU Counseling and Psychological Services. Ever since this experience, Ashlee has been dedicated to helping women overcome their eating disorders and live more healthy and meaningful lives.